I always thought that I could go to you whenever anything happens.
I thought that things were working out just fine although I admit I was taking things quite slowly.
People said we were so good together.
I did things that now I regret it so much, but it does not change a thing to what has happened between us.
My heart hurts every single time I see you.
Therefore, I faked a smile every single time I see you.
I faked my "tidak-apa-face" so that you won't know what am I thinking or what I am feeling that moment.
All because I did not want you to see me crying anymore.
All because I just don't want to let you see how much I am suffering after hurting you that badly.
All because I don't want you to suffer no more.
You are my angel that I cherish so much.
Despite what I have done, I still love you.
And although I know I've said I did not love you anymore, I was telling a lie.
My heart hurts so badly that moment I told you what I didn't mean, just to get you out.
Our distance is a factor and so does communication.
I thought we could work that out.
I thought we could work that out.
But I guess all is too late now.
What I did was unforgivable, and I never asked for your forgiveness.
What I had, I did not know until the day I lost you.
Life without you, is going to be so different, but I will move on.
I will stay strong, and be stronger than I ever was.
See, I rather be your lover than be your friend. And if I can't be the one you want and need then I rather not be your friend at all.
Being mean is the only way I can force myself to accept the fact that life now is going to be without you. I will not bring up the past anymore and will move on. Though it hurts so badly but I believe time will heal whatever that's left of me. Life will never be the same anymore without you but I will stay strong and be stronger than I ever was.
There are things we don't want it to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn and people we can't live without but have to let go.
I love you. ♥
you are the best I have ever had.
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