A Chinese post below that I've typed but yet to finish typing. Can't really remember what this is all about though.
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“我能找到一个比我跟主动的人吗？”
我算是一个主动的女生了。我会把握机会，因为生活很短暂。我会珍惜，因为生活很短暂。可是，有人会珍惜我吗？有人会把握我自造的机会吗？难道，是要等到失去之后才发现它的完美吗? 难道要等到失去后才发觉到它的重要吗？
看看我的心，的确是很不完美，但它很漂亮。
看看我的心，的确是有好多裂痕，但它很漂亮。
看看我的心， 的确是已经碎了好多次，但它还有本事去爱。
我的心碎的很，谁还要呢？
生命短暂，做什么事都要用心去做。
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Sometimes all you need right now is for someone to give a shit about you. And when nobody does, you move on with life. No point sitting down, waiting for that care to come. No point caring why or what when a person can't afford to care. Care doesn't give a shit, and I shouldn't too. It's always September! Everything seems to go wrong during this time of the month! And just why does the heart feel the hurt?
It's happening, all over again. History, it's repeating itself, right in front of my eyes. Taken my own precaution. Taken care of myself. Yet everything always falls apart in September. What can I do to stop it from repeating? How can I not let history take it's place once more? Will I ever learn? Dejavu. I always never learn.
The heart yells out in pain. Stupid tears blurred the eyes. So hard to fight back those tears, letting it wet the cheek. Stained right cheek, oh how I feel bad. Need to get out, need to be listening to some stupid songs. Need to be around people. No point putting myself through this kind of misery once more. No point putting myself through this kind of torture. I love myself too much to know what I deserve, and this is not what I deserve.
Doubts fills my heart. Paranoia fills my head. My soul is too broken to care anymore. You give up, you're not worth it. I walk away, I don't deserve to be treated like that. Not searching for an answer, just searching for comfort. All I question is why. And I guess it's too late.
" I chose you, you tell me my choice will be worth it. Don't make me regret it. Please."
It's been so long time since I've met someone who makes me feel this way.
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