Kept myself safe.

1 step, 2 step, 3 and 4
Each was a step, that should not be taken
Heart races, adrenaline rush
Those feelings were real
A mistake committed, unable to withdraw
landed me a spot right here right now
it became a choice, not a mistake
I thought I could, without realizing
for I should have known
Should have stayed away
Should have kept myself safe

Steps that cannot be withdrawn
Told me that I was too naive
Screaming at my face, get out fast
Never thought it would last
Never thought it would hurt
Never thought it would be this bad
1 step, 2 step, 3 and 4
Every step took was a disaster
Every step taken was a tragedy
Should have kept myself alive


Followed my heart, wrong place
My mind says, come back
A mistake, can't be undone
A step, can't be retraced
A love, can't be returned
Heart was wrong, everything was wrong
Then why was it right in the first place?
Drowning in confusion, I gasp for air
Sinking down in sadness, I struggle to crawl up
I should have really kept myself safe


It wasn't meant to be
It never was meant to be
Knew it from the start
Withdrawal was hard
I thought I could, without realizing
Fallen down that hole I dug my own
Why must it be so real?
Why must it feel so real?
I was lost in a world between
The ability to differentiate was grabbed from me
I need to protect myself


Took away my dignity
Tore away my sanity
Raped my virginity
Left me standing naked
Everyone knew, made me looked like a fool
An outcast, being left at the corner
Everyone looked, I shut the glares
Inside, it felt like fire
Strip me bare and left me standing in the cold
I need to cover myself


Just about to walk away, never turning back
One last touch took my breath away
Touch me, chilled me to the bones
Kiss me, made my heart raced
Caress me, burned me inside out
Nowhere to hide, nowhere to run
Boiling inside, I killed whatever that's left of me
Tears of anger rushed out
Contained inside would destroy me
I walked with pride, head held high


Emotions run wild, tears run dry
Those words will haunt me

Unspoken words, written in letters
Haunting me, replaying scenes in mind
It was never meant to be
Too late to turn back
Cannot be undone
Only can be severed
Should have stayed away
Should have kept me safe from harm


1 step, 2 step, 3 and 4
Each step, a pain
The story of us, wasn't even a story
It wasn't even 500 days old
A simple complication lead to a fallout
Drowning in confusion, gasping for air
4 step, 3 step, 2 and 1
Steps that can't be traced
Words unspoken, walking in silence
Hands held, eyes that never met
Everyone watch, as the battle unraveled


My dignity, gone
My sanity, alive
My virginity, taken
My pride, hanging
Pretending is hard, I start to falter
My body waver, I felt foolish
Tears drown my cries for help
All around me people start to wonder
The stares, the glares; watching
The talk, the whisper; speaking
I tried to protect what's left of me


1 step, falling
2 step, fallen
3 step, dragged
4 step, crumpled
5 steps, broken
I learn to live
I learn to survive
Scars for life
Memories fading
Goodbye; it's final
Shame felt, bore right through
How many times, til I get it right
I should have kept myself safe





xxx





Copyrighted.
Written by syunz.

Unspoken words; haunt me 'til memories fade.